Gratitude, really?

NEDERLAND - As this season of being hyperaware of gratitude approaches I try to stop before saying out loud, “Gratitude, really?” 

This has not been an easy year. Sitting at the bedside of my teenage son for weeks listening to machines beeping day and night, seeing tubes go into his body, watching people take his blood over and over, seeing him lose the ability to walk, having him go into procedure after procedure, and the doctors at Children’s Hospital not knowing what was happening is horrible on a parent. Gratitude, really?

I am a single mom. My daughter had to finish the school year, she was going from house to house. What does she do in the summer? Gratitude?

I had to move out of the house I had been living in for 17 years. The house I raised my kids in. I found a place, but how was I supposed to physically pack and move when I am in Aurora with a kid in the hospital. Gratitude?

Yes, absolute gratitude! 

The doctors did figure out what my son has. It is a rare condition for kids and we have a long journey ahead of us. The love and care of the nurses, doctors, occupational therapists, physical therapists, speech therapists, therapy dogs, chaplains, psychologists, and Child Life specialists was profound. I would be amiss to not mention the cleaning and food staff. One of the highlights of my day was seeing the woman who cleaned our room on the 8th floor. Her conversation and wonderful attitude brought joy to my days. 

One day while at the hospital my son asked me why I talk to the cleaning and food service people so much. I responded by saying that they work hard at a job that is often unseen in our society. I want them to know that I see and value them. Teaching moments do not stop when we are in the hospital.  

All the continuing appointments, therapies, surgery, another hospital stay, and education I have to learn to help my son at home has been overwhelming at times. I am very thankful to the very patient nurses who have shown us how to use the devices we need to have and helped give us the confidence that we can do this. 

To the friends who drove all the way to Aurora, Barb and Christy, to bring me food, supplies, conversation, and see a friendly face from home, I am forever grateful. 

My colleagues at The Mountain-Ear, thank you for covering the events I traditionally cover when I could not. Thank you for showing me grace and standing by me. I am grateful. 

To my community, and to friends near, far and very far I do not know what I would do without the financial support that came our way. I am still in awe. 

Thanks to my long time neighbors, Chris and Valerie, my cousin Jill from Grand Junction, and my church community (Nederland Community Presbyterian Church) we did get moved. I am overcome with tears of gratitude.

To the Nederland Middle-Senior High School community, thank you for all you are doing. Thank you for looking at our situation and working with us. It would be easier to be closer to Children’s. My kids do not want to go to school anywhere else (and I like my work here, too).

Someone asked me not all ago, “How are you getting through this?” I answered that I didn’t know. I do know that I was raised by parents who believed in hope. We can choose to be bitter toward life when difficult times arise or look at the situation and learn and grow from it. And the lessons we learn can probably help someone else someday. 

I do not know why my kids and I are on this journey. It is really hard sometimes. At the same time, there are blessings. We are crossing paths with some amazing people, we are learning more about ourselves and each other and I have an enormous amount of gratitude. Gratitude creates joy. I see sparkles of joy in my life. And I hope to see more as we get further through this journey. 

Thank you, community of friends and family for holding us and caring for us.