BOULDER COUNTY - A contingency of Boulder County’s funkier folks have joined forces in a class action lawsuit against the County due to its alleged “discrimination” for continuing to use the name “Stinky Gulch” when referring to its locally-known hiking trails and road that stretch up from the Town of Nederland to Mud Lake. 

With local historians claiming that the area received the moniker of being malodorous as a result of coffins from the nearby Nederland Cemetery having shifted underground, those mustier-than-most have grown intolerant of having their natural odors be compared to that of rotting flesh.   

This faction of olfactory offenders, led by 55-year-old activist and widowed sausage-maker, Ms. Liv R. Enonions, have enlisted the services of famed young hotshot lawyer known for turning heads, Bryan O. Problem, and launched their litigation against the County at the end of March. 

“My clients have been very quiet for years about their displeasure and pain caused by the cruel lawmakers and trendsetters serving in local government,” Problem said. “But don’t mistake their stifled words for weakness, for they are about to prove that they can be silent-but-deadly.” 

Problem promises swift retribution, as he believes the County has cut off its nose to spite its face.

“It’s a sure thing,” he boasted. “My clients just need to keep their noses clean, while I keep mine to the grindstone, and when this is all won by more than a nose, they’ll be paying out of theirs.”

Enonions’ campaign began with a petition being cropdusted across the front range and beyond, which quickly gained traction with cannabis enthusiasts, jam band festival attendees, cyclists, teenage boys, that guy from the gym who doesn’t wipe down the equipment after using it, and dreadlocked caucasians. 

In addition to pursuing compensation from the County for emotional damages, this fetid family of reeking retribution-seekers have also offered their own suggestions for alternative names to “Stinky Gulch” in hopes of changing public perception. 

Leading suggestions include “Pheromone Valley,” “Gorgeous Gorge,” and “Wook Nook.” Meanwhile, an overly-tanned coalition from New Jersey has offered to finance a rebranding campaign under the condition that the gulch be renamed “Axe Body Spray Canyon.”