“I’m autistic,” Shannon began by way of introduction. “I’m a part of several neuro-divergent communities on-line, plus my nephew is on the spectrum. But my sister doesn’t get it. She says I’m just antisocial and rude.” I paused to notice Shannon’s nonverbal communication - eye contact (she was staring at a bird in the tree behind me), body language (playing with string on her shirt), facial expressions (neutral).

“Shannon, is this a diagnosis you received when you were young?” I asked, curious about her history.

“I’ve always been ‘weird,’ even as a kid,” Shannon deflected responding to my specific question. “I was raised by my dad, and I didn’t do any of that ‘girl’ stuff.”

“Have you been to counseling before?” I changed directions to see how she’d handle it. “Not really. I talked to my pastor at church, but that’s about it. She suggested I give you a call.”

“My kid does NOT have ADHD,” Jerry raised his voice and leaned forward assertively in his chair. “He gets really focused on his hobbies (mountain biking at the moment), and has a lot of energy, but that’s normal. I was like that as a kid too. I’m sick of my wife saying he needs counseling!” Jane, his wife, took a deep breath, and dove right in.

“Jerry’s family thinks any kind of mental health support means you’re crazy. His dad has had problems for years, but never talked to anyone about it. The family pretends like he’s ‘normal,’ and always makes excuses for him. I mean, the man treats Jerry terribly, never asking him about his life, never remembering his birthday, nothing.”

“What does my dad have to do with anything?” asked Jerry. “We’re talking about our son. He just needs a winter sport. Then he’ll have a place to burn off all that extra energy and be fine.”

Did you know according to the World Health Organization’s (WHO) World Mental Health Report about one in eight people in the world live with a mental disorder and that most people go completely untreated? Additionally when formal mental health services exist, they are often inaccessible, unaffordable, or put the person at risk for discrimination and ostracization.

In the United States, a current study by Bayer for American Heart Month showed that 39% of Americans used online information instead of seeing a physician and the average person self-diagnosed four times in the past year based on information they found online.

After a more direct conversation, Shannon shared she had never been diagnosed with any mental health disorder, nor had she spoken with any medical professionals about her concerns. I spoke with Shannon about the concept of differential diagnosis (for example, in order to be diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) will need to be ruled out), co-morbidity (a second or third diagnosis in addition to autism spectrum disorder is common), and the critical role of obtaining an accurate diagnosis in order to receive appropriate support. “Being ‘rude’ due to autism spectrum disorder, ADHD, cultural differences, trauma, childhood, etc. all require different interventions,” I explained.

Jerry, Jane, and I took time to talk through some of Jerry’s painful childhood (and adulthood) experiences with his father. As a result, Jerry began to see some similarities between his son and his father, and signed his son up for an assessment with a pediatric psychiatrist. It turned out his son was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and in need of specific interventions.

Sorting through mental health diagnoses, resources, options, and opinions can be overwhelming and confusing (let alone expensive). But if a diagnosis is important for your health and well-being, it’s important to take the steps to be assessed by a medical professional and learn about the treatment options. You might be surprised about how helpful it can be.

I’d love to hear from you about your own experiences at amy@peaktopeakcounseling.com, 303-258-7454, and you can always find past articles at www.peaktopeakcounseling.com or find us at www.facebook.com/peaktopeakcounselingservices.