When I was in my pre-teens I never gave love much thought. The only thing I knew about it was what I heard in songs or read about in books. I thought it was a fictitious tale made up to tap into the pathos of humanity.

Some say that women start thinking about love and marriage early in life. That wasn’t my case, but I also grew up witnessing things that would make me question the entire idea. Then, I turned 23.

I fell madly in love with a young man from Alabama. Two people from different worlds came together for four years of miserable passion. Fast forward to the end of that chapter, he broke my heart, giving new meaning to the word love.

According to npr.org, the origins of Valentine’s Day celebrations are dark and bloody. During the middle of February, Romans celebrated the feast of Lupercalia, an annual festival held by a corporation of priests known as the Luperci.

The festivities began with the sacrifice of goats and a dog. Two Luperci members would approach the altar and have their foreheads touched with a bloody knife. The blood was wiped-off with wool dipped in milk. The ritual ended when the two priests laughed.

Listen, I don’t make this stuff up. The internet does. Another story associates Valentine’s Day with the third-century executions of two men named Valentine on February 14. Their death was honored by the Catholic Church with the celebration of St. Valentine’s Day.

During the fifth century, Pope Gelasius I combined St. Valentine’s Day with Lupercalia in hopes of diminishing pagan rituals. Around this time, Normans were celebrating Galatin’s Day, meaning “lover of women” day.

Thanks to Shakespeare and Chaucer getting their hands on the holiday, romanticism took hold of Europe during the middle ages, making this day perfect for handmade paper cards. By the time it hit the new world, humans had no chance of escaping what came next.

Many holidays in the U.S. are labeled Hallmark holidays, including Valentine’s Day. Why? Because Hallmark saw an opportunity to make billions of dollars from a simple story, changing our lives forever.

Hallmark’s website states that Valentine’s Day is named after Saint Valentinus, who wrote a farewell letter to a girl saying “From Your Valentine” before his death on February 14, 296 A.D. By 1910, the company began selling Valentine’s Day postcards.

Some researchers claim that this holiday of love puts unnecessary pressure on relationships. Don’t we do that to ourselves? Expectations, rules, and guidelines have never been part of my idea of love. Freedom to be me 100% of the time and be appreciated for that? Now, that’s love!

So, what are the origins, myths, and legends surrounding Valentine’s Day? My guess is whichever you want to believe. Valentine’s Day is celebrated across the globe in various ways. Whether it’s romantic love, friendship, or family, we’ve all experienced it.

After Jon shredded my heart, I convinced myself I would never fall in love again. Then, I turned 40. I met someone who triggered a series of fireworks in my soul, leading me to once again believe in the most ethereal experience of the human heart.

Valentine’s Day is located at the center of whatever day you want. You can reach it by digging deep into your soul and accepting yourself as much as someone else. To learn more, open your heart to love any day, time, or place.